The Clean Freak Chronicles

Monica Geller is the role model for all the clean-freaks around the world. Any friend who's obsessive about cleanliness and tidiness and neatness and all other such "ehhh" things that scares the life out of housemates, is lovingly called Monica. You won't believe how pleased they are if you name them so.

But to be married to one, is a whole new deal. I feel like I am enacting various characters from Friends - Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Joey while my husband is The Monica. Or maybe he is Sheldon and I am Penny.


I mean seriously, if he wanders at night to clean the house, I won't be surprised. Our apartment is clean by normal human standards, but by his standards, it's a living dump of entropy. The scissor should be in the cupboard next to bowls and plates, blazer and coats packed in covers and hung towards the far end and  the shampoos arranged in line by height (increasing or decreasing - yeah atleast I have a choice here). Well, while I am shampooing I am more worried about they burning my eyes rather then their god forsaken height!!

To be honest, I am Intel 4004 when it comes to processing all this information. I completely shut down when such complicated instructions are fired at a rapid rate. His latest policy in the kitchen after washing all the utensils is - instead of putting them on the shelf for drying, rub each one of them with a towel to soak all the water and immediately put them in the cupboard. Where on earth does he gets all these ideas from? Is there a guidebook to "Tips to make your wife go bat crap crazy"?

It took me more than 3 weeks to finally comply. Why... because I am lazy!! :P


I have separate boxes to keep my clothes, paper crafts, books and nail polishes, while he keeps his camera stuffs far far away from my reach. He is forever scared of me messing his painstakingly done arrangements. The days I make paper crafts are the days of his eternal pain. We have carpet floor and pieces of paper tend to stick to it. I could feel his eyes watching me, and with each piece of paper falling on the carpet, I could hear him wince. Of course I have to clean up, brush the carpet and put things exactly where they were.

The only time I am inspired to fold and refold the clothes is when the internet the down. I even found the perfect gift for this birthday, the clean freak house slippers :P Need to find a store that sells them.



Are you too living with a clean freak?

All pictures - courtesy Pinterest, Tumblr, Google

35 comments:

  1. Oh hell to the Y.E.A.H!!!!! Finally someone writes my heart out!!
    I totally know what you're talking about!! But luckily my man has become a tad lazy so the house is now as neat as "I" want it to be!!
    But whenever he is in charge of the household chores (read every weekend) the Monica inside totally jumps up with glee and does a happy dance!! �� infact I even send him cleaning pins whenever I come across any on Pinterest!! ��
    And to say I was called Monica by most of roomies!! ��

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    1. oh god you send him cleaning pins!! that's insane :P
      poor guy :P
      you are one step ahead of Monica

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  2. Lol! You have a humouros bone. I understand, obsessive compulsive cleanliness disorder can freak you out.

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    1. freaks me out too :P Thanks a lot for writing in.

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  3. I think your husband will love my post today! He sounds a lot like my brother and I pity my sister-in-law! ;)

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    1. yeah I read it :D hhahaha your poor SIL

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  4. Soon going to live with a Monica!! *crying*

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  5. Oh, how I wish! My husband and I are both kind of slobs. ;)

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    1. ROFL :D I wish I wish ... thanks for writing in

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  6. Hehe...I'm the Monica in my house...Oh God how very similar my husband and sister feel when they move anything or do anything,....Infact when I'm watching my sister always messes up out of nervousness ;)

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    1. Oh my... you hitler sister :P I pity her... poor gal :) I am pretty sure they must be going through the same emotions.

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  7. Rajlakshmi, I am also named cleanliness freak by my family. I want every thing in it proper place. Some times my husband tells me it is a house, it is not a museum . It is difficult to change !

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    1. ROFL at your husband's comment :D That;s true though. My dad is a clean freak.

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  8. Aren't you the lucky one, Rajlakshmi? ;) But girl, I admire you for your patience :) I would go crazy too, but I don't mind some order and cleanliness especially when it is being done by others! Those are some great slippers :)

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    1. The thing is not only would he clean himself, he would make watch and teach!! gosh!! I would be tethering on my patience :P
      Thanks for writing in.

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  9. My husband is a mini Monica Geller too! But thanks to living with me, it has started rubbing off on him now ;)

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    1. ROFL that's awesome... :D you can now live in peace. :P

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  10. My mother is a Monica indeed..I am more of a Rachel :P

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    1. And I fluctuate between Rachel and Joey :P

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  11. I have the gift to find order in chaos. Yes, I am LAZY :P

    Destination Infinity

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    1. hahaha that's a superb talent :P :P
      thanks for writing in

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  12. Hahaha..it was amusing to read. Hope your husband doesn't read this anytime soon :p
    Hmm...luckily I don't know a "Monica" . :p

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    1. He knows that I would be writing out all my fustration :P
      you lucky boy,,, wait till one comes in your life :P

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  13. hahaha.. if my husband had a blog, he would have reposted this article for sure. :P He throws his clothes around and I keep scolding him for not keeping the house clean. :)

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    1. hahaha so you are the Monica Geller of your house :D

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  14. lol... hilarious post Princess!! :)
    poor biker...
    //the clean freak house slippers // I need them toooooooooo :O but I am not a cleanliness freak :D

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    1. I loved those slippers too. Wish I could get them in stores.

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  15. Haha!! Poor you!! I am lucky to have a husband who wouldn't know the difference between a freshly mopped and mopped a week before house.
    I think if he was a clean freak, the lazy me would have divorced him!!

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    1. hahaha good for you gal :D you can clean whenever you please and not by the hour :P Thanks for writing in.

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  16. LOL! Well in our case, both of us are jus the opp.... imagine the task we hv in our hand when we hv guests coming. not funny I tell yea :)

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    1. Ohh the flurry when the guests arrive :P happens to me all the time :P

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  17. haha! Hilarious post. My room is a complete mess all the time and if a Monica was to walk in.. I am pretty sure I would be dead by now.

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